Fair?

There are quite a few definitions of the word “fair” in The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language. The one I think applies here is: “Just to all parties; equitable”

I was talking to a friend with small children yesterday who said she was explaining to her kids that the world isn’t always fair. That’s true. Fair is not the natural state of the world. Fair is an average, something most of us agree on that usually falls halfway between opposing points of view. Fairness implies that there are more extreme opinions on both sides of the issue. Notice that MOST people hold these more moderate opinions and that “MOSTness” is what makes them fair in any society. Society’s opinions change over time. This country once thought that “separate but equal” was fair.

We should teach our kids to be fair, to exemplify fairness in their lives and to work for more fairness in the world. But we do them a disservice to teach them that things usually are fair.

We always have to balance what is “fair” to individuals and “fair” to society. Attached is a copy of a news article about a little boy who is so good at pitching in his Little League that adults think it is unfair and frightening to the other kids. So he has been banned. Many are outraged about “punishing” a child for being “too good.” So, what is “fair” to the pitcher may not be “fair” to the other kids. How should we decide?

Personally, I think each individual (or parent, in this case) needs to decide for themselves. The pitcher’s options are to pitch, not pitch, or pitch in a more challenging league. All are valid options. The other kid’s options are to play, not play or play in a less challenging league. In that part of the world, I’m sure, that league is the most convenient, but not the “only game in town.” These are all possible individual choices and fair, in my opinion.

What seems unfair is banding together to force the young pitcher out when there are possible, fair, individual options.

That’s unfair to the pitcher. And it’s unfair to the other kids whose parents are teaching them that you should hold back others to make things “fair” for yourself.

But that’s just my opinion, I could be wrong.